Follow the Red Brick Road

            When you’re unemployed you find that you really will do almost anything to get a job. Yesterday I had an interview in the city, an hour away by train. Of course I convinced myself that it didn’t matter. This was going to be great. I like going into the city, I could wear nice clothes and go sip a latte at Starbucks with the hipsters and the lawyers. I suppose going into the city makes me feel like an adult. So at 8 O’clock in the morning I clambered onto the train with the rest of the working world. I marched up the aisle all self-important with my pretty dress and fancy shoes and went to plop down in the nearest bench. Being the smooth business woman that I am I proceed to whack my head on the luggage rack directly above me. I held my head and looked around hoping that no one had seen. Sadly, right across the aisle way from me sat an old man. He was staring at me, his mouth hanging open. I could almost hear him begging to ask “Are you really that stupid?”
            Feeling rather deflated I sunk into the corner of the bench and played with my phone, sulking like a two year old.  Luckily the train ride being an hour gave me plenty of time to forget about it and I bounded off again pumped full of promise. I had made a plan the night before on my route, the train times, the bus I was meant to take, and how long the overall journey would be. Sadly, once getting off the train, I couldn’t find the bus. Ah well, I was undefeatable still. It’s a city, how hard could it be to walk there? I set my phone’s GPS with the job’s address and headed off into the general direction. Or was it? I have never been very good with maps and the only reason I don’t get lost while driving is because my GPS in the car, Germmie, talks to me, yells at me when I mess up, and recalculates. My smartphone is nowhere as smart as Germmie and I walked up and down three or four different streets until I figured out what direction the phone was attempting to get me to go in. I enjoyed the confused and annoyed looks of the city goers as they watched me spin around in circles, stop randomly to consult my phone, and then storm off in the opposite direction.
            Eventually I gave up trying to figure out my phone and made the executive decision to follow the red brick road laid out for tourists to follow. I realize how completely embarrassing that is, a native, using a tourist route to find their way around the city. I also realize how embarrassing it is to use the red brick road, and still get lost. In my defense the road just stopped and went in the opposite direction. So I stood at the corner confused, and slightly nervous. That’s when I saw the bus I was supposed to take pass me by. The city was mocking me. I stormed off angrily after the bus figuring well; at least I know it’s going in the direction I need to go. For the next hour I walked after it, occasionally catching glimpses of it. I did manage to find the right street after a while. By now it was 10 O’clock, I had an hour left before my interview. Prefect I’d walk down the street and find it. I turned the GPS back on and followed the little blue dot till it reached the address.
            That address turned out to be behind an eight foot fence with a security camera pointed directly at me. I could see the building. I could see the address on the building. I could also see that the only way to get to the building was to walk all the way down to the very end of the street and get past security and walk all the way back up the street. By the time I reached the building it was half past. I huffed my way up the stairs and darted into the bathroom before anyone could see me. I quickly prepped my hair, straightened out my dress, and checked for anything out of order before gracefully walking into the office.
            The first person I saw was another girl about my age filling out applications. She was dressed in yoga pants and a T-Shirt. I silently did a celebratory dance and waited my turn. The girl sauntered into the office and I could hear her and the interviewer talking. He did the typical run down and then asked if she had any questions.
            “Um, ya, can I like ask for a day off?” She said.
            “Well, it’s a bit early to be asking that, but as long as you don’t go crazy. Is there something you need to do?” He asked.
            “Yeeeeeaaaah, It’s my friend’s grad party on the 18^th and I’m going to that.”
            “Ok. Can you start Friday?”
            I sat there shocked as she walked out of the office schedule in hand, then I started feeling good. I mean if someone else could walk in wearing yoga pants and already asking for days off, then the job is in the bag. I patiently waited to be called in as he finished up some business. Finally he called me in and we both sat down for the interview.
            Before he could even open his mouth his phone went off. He was out of the chair in seconds answering it and having a conversation. After a while he returned to his seat and looked at my resume. He began to ask me a question when his co-worker walked in and asked him a question. The two proceeded to chat for a while before the attention was brought back to me. The entire interview went like that. Finally after 20 minutes the interviewer handed me a form to fill out and then said,
            “OK, um, I need you to go get a drug screening. This is the address of the clinic we use. It’s right next door. Once the test is processed we’ll meet up again. Oh, and there closed noon to one. Bad timing huh? Good luck.”
            And just like that I was sent on my merry way.
            I plugged the address into my phone only to realize the clinic that is “right next door” is actually another two miles away, outside of the city. I contemplated my options. I couldn’t exactly come back the next day, nor could I really give up an opportunity for employment. I ended up trudging to this clinic. Because normal people usually drive there my journey became interesting. I had find a way around a rotary and hike next to a dual carriage way. By the time I got to the clinic I was done. Sunburnt, blistered, and extremely hungry I stomped up the doors of the clinic and pulled at the handle. Locked.
            I stood there, my hand glued to the handle. I still had to wait for these people to come back from lunch. I took a deep breath and then exhaled. Fine, It’s Okay, I can find something to eat too. I walked out to the parking lot and scanned for a McDonald’s, they’re supposed to be available every ten feet. Nothing. Not even a convenience store. Where did the nurses go for an hour?  Home Depot? I circled the building and spotted it. In the distance was a beacon of hope and life. K-Mart. I only hoped it wasn’t a mirage. I limped my way across two parking lots and practically ran through the doors. I grabbed the first food and I could and then booked in back the clinic.
            By now the nurses had opened the clinic back up. I stepped into the AC, checked in, and plopped into the nearest seat. I sat slumped down and devoured my food box like a wildebeest. When the nurse came for me she found me sitting covered in crumbs with a whole gram-cracker shoved in my mouth.
            “Christina?”
            “Mmmfph?” I stared up at her, not really caring that I looked like a five year old.
            “We’re ready for you.”
            I spent a total of ten minutes in the clinic and now I had to make the long walk back to the center of the city.  Luckily for me, the bench I collapsed onto after the two mile walk back into the city itself turned out to be a bus stop. Not just any bus stop but my bus. After all this time I found the bus I was supposed to get onto hours ago. The bus driver took pity on me and helped me find my way back to the center of the city. I wish I could say my journey back was uneventful. It wasn’t. I spent most of the time waiting for the subway with a box cutter in my hand as a drug addict attempted to make conversation with me. By the time I got home it was past five in the evening. After all that all I could think to myself was. “The job…. It’s selling tickets to tourists.”
            The things we do for even the chance of getting any kind of job.